public apology

For the last three nights, Esther and I have been babysitting for a family that the parents have gone away on a personal trip and only wanted the people who had to know, they were away.

I had posted in my family group about my  log of tiredness, as I wrote in yesterday's blog, and when they asked why I was so tired and my siblings wanted to know who  etc , I of course I kept the confidentiality clause, which upset some of them deeply.

Then this morning, I met my mother in law, who told me that one of my family members had messaged her saying that she had something for me and asking where I was. I got mad and put a strong voicemail on the group saying how wrong that is - to sneakily try and find out where I was through Esther's mother.

But then that member of family spoke to me and said they really had something to give me, and hadn't been following the group. They had been out last night with that item and apparently tried to call me.

When I didn't answer, they asked my mother in law to try find me in order to get the item to me. It was just bad timing.

I apologise to this person for doubting them also here, but this has taught me that sometimes people say something, or do something, and it just happens to be at a bad time.

I have a bad trait, as I've been hurt so much by people close, that I find it really difficult to trust people. I need to learn to trust and understand there are people out there that won't use me or take advantage of me.

I guess what I'm saying is that we all have to work on ourselves and nobody's perfect.

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